Little Poppy Seed, you have stolen my concentration and productivity. I am finding myself just staring at walls and thinking of you.
Right now I am feeling a bit hopeless and a bit, for want of a better term, useless. It isn’t a feeling that is unfamiliar to me, I often go through times like this. I can only explain it as a sense that I have landed in an era where I don’t quite belong and everything is a little out of focus. Where it’s all moving too quickly. Where there is pain and suffering that I cannot understand and that I cannot help. Where there is too much sensation, everything seems too busy, too loud and too complex for me to comprehend.
Despite this I am not unhappy.
I don’t feel like I am of much value right now but I am not unhappy.
I have you and I have my babies. I have a husband who says “Chin up Polly, there are a few things you’re good at” and a Mum who loves me.
I have friends who care and family who remain close and connected.
I have a body and mind that do all I require of them, that get me out of bed and through my days without a conscious thought.
I have sunshine and I have laughter.
And again, I have you. A precious life growing inside me.
I want you to know Little Poppy Seed that I am flawed.
I want you to know that I won’t be a perfect Mum. Or a perfect friend. Or a perfect teacher.
I’ll make countless mistakes.
I’ll repeat them.
But I’ll always love you like nobody else will ever love you.
I’ll always remember how perfect it felt when we found each other.
I’ll always remember how you stole my heart before yours even started to beat.
Tim Tams
the biscuit
- 1 cup macadamias
- 10 medjool dates, seeds removed
- 1 tablespoon coconut flour
- 1/2 teaspoon concentrated natural vanilla extract
- pinch of salt
the filling*
- 10 medjool dates, seeds removed
- 2 rounded tablespoons coconut cream (mine had been in the over night fridge, I used the solid component)
- 1/2 teaspoon concentrated natural vanilla extract
- pinch of salt
the chocolate
- 200 grams dark chocolate, melted
- Preheat your oven to 175°C or 350°F
- Place the biscuit ingredients into your food processor and blend at high speed until the mixture is smooth, well combined and sticking together.
- Roll the mixture into a ball.
- Place the ball between two sheets of baking paper and roll out until the mixture is quite thin. Approximately 3mm – 5mm.
- Remove the top layer of baking paper and score the mixture into small rectangles. I made 20 rectangles and I had a few off cuts that I shaped into two cookies.
- Place the sheet of baking paper with the scored rectangles onto a baking tray and bake for 10 minutes or until golden. Turn the tray half way through cooking.
- Remove the tray from the oven and leave the biscuits to cool for 10 – 15 minutes.
- Gently transfer the rectangles onto a cooling rack.
- This is a great time to make the filling if you haven’t already.
- Place the filling ingredients into your food processor and pulse. Scrap the mixture back onto the blades and pulse again. I do this a few times until teh dates are fairly broken down and the mixture is combined. Mine isn’t smooth and it still works perfectly.
- Spread half of the rectangle biscuits with the filling and top with another biscuit. Once the biscuits are complete place them into the fridge for 10 – 20 minutes to cool.
- Melt your chocolate.
- Dip half of each biscuit into your chocolate and then place it onto a tray lined with baking paper. Place the biscuits into the fridge to set.
- After 10 – 20 minutes dip the alternate side of your biscuits into the melted chocolate.
- Place in the fridge to set.
- Enjoy!!!
*you will have filling left over but if I make less than this is doesn’t work so well in my processor. The caramel filling is delicious exactly as it is but if you don’t think you will use the leftovers you can either double the biscuit mixture or half the filling ingredients.
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